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chronicles-serial-dater-part-three

Chronicles of a Former Serial Dater Part III

April 4, 2019 0 Comments

You're going to have to catch up...

Chronicles of a Former Serial Dater Part I
Chronicles of a Former Serial Dater Part II

In Part II, I talked about Danielle and the mysteriously captivating serial she would feed me.  Honey Nut Cheerios I think she had a bowl ready and waiting every single time I saw her.  That smile, those freckles I didn’t know it, but I was caught up. What’s even crazier is I think she was actually good for me. Could something that tasted like that actually be good? One thing is for sure, she was most definitely packed with vitamins and nutrients. That being said, Danielle was my weakness and being so young, I had no idea what the hell I was doing.  All I knew was that when I left her, I felt like I had gotten my daily supply.

Furthermore, of all the women I was seeing, Danielle was #1.

No, I didn’t have a ranking system.  However, I did know who I gravitated towards.

You’re probably thinking…

Why didn’t I make her my girlfriend?

About that Baby

The night I found out Danielle was pregnant was one that will live in infamy.

Even now as I type, I am envisioning that moment.  The steps towards her dorm after she had summoned me like an Egyptian queen.  My pace quickened. My heart was skipping beats like a broken record. I wasn’t thinking about the fact that I was a serial dater. I was thinking like a man in a relationship.  What the hell was I doing? Why do I feel this way?

Pull ya skirt up Jay! She got a whole boyfriend at home!

I arrived at her dorm and she wasn’t downstairs.  So I waited. Wouldn’t you know it, #3 walked off the elevator and says… “waiting on Danielle?”

My face exactly… little-boy-looking-gif-chronicles-serial-dater-part-three

I don’t know why I cared about what she thought.  Why I felt a certain sense of embarrassment — but I did.  She kept on walking with a wry smile on her face. As if to say, “wait until I see you…” More about her later.

If you remember I told you, they all knew about each other.  Furthermore, they didn’t care.  Again, we were just young kids having fun. It was all-to-the-good, and besides, I was about to see Danielle. That was the only thing that mattered to me.

Serial Dater Blues

The elevator opens. Out walks Danielle.  Light-blue jeans, a fitting white tee-shirt, and some red Chuck Taylors. Her hair wasn’t done and she had a look of sadness I hadn’t seen before.  I think she tried to mask her feelings when she noticed that my face reacted to her body language.  You see, Danielle and I had built a rapport —  and I’ve always been somewhat of an empath when it comes to detecting a person’s energy.  In other words, it was written all over her face.

At this instant, Danielle says… “sit down I need to talk to you.”

Now all men know when a woman says that, some shit is about to pop-off. As a result, my heart was beating like a Florida A&M drum solo.  Palms sweaty, skin balmy, I feel a chill down my spine.  What is this woman about to tell me?

In so little words…

Jay, I’m pregnant.

[refer to the GIF above for my facial reaction]

I tend to make that face a lot — and she caught it.  However, her reaction wasn’t as I expected.

A little foreshadowing.  I have two sons. (you thought there was more?) That’s it. I have two boys… and neither one of them came from Danielle.  She was pregnant from her boyfriend at home.  This was not only an announcement, but it was also a “breakup.”

I can’t remember if I told you, but Danielle was an athlete.  Getting pregnant was the worse thing that could’ve happened to her.  The sorrow she felt, [was] about that, but surprisingly more about me.

 

In Love with a Serial Dater

As if this news wasn’t bad enough.  I felt like the credits had finally come to an end, and I was getting up to walk out. As soon as I stand up, she says…

Jay, I’m in love with you.

[refer to the GIF again please]. 

You in what with what?

This woman got a whole baby growing inside her talkin’ bout’ some love.  Nevertheless, I sat back down and she began to cry.  Without going into too much detail she told me that she had broken up with her boyfriend about a month ago and she wanted to be with me. The baby was a nuclear bomb and her heart was Nagasaki.  She knew this new revelation was the end of us.

Ya think?

Ok, I was thinking that — I didn’t say it (I was cold, I wasn’t an asshole). I was uber sensitive towards her situation because I already knew she was having sex with him. This was always a possibility.  I believe the initial feeling I had was more relief than anything. On some Nino Brown — “see ya, wouldn’t wanna be ya” shit.

The crazy part about all this is, when I was younger, I had a heart of ice. The effect that women had on me was… minimal. Despite that fact, Danielle was the exception. I thought I’d be able to walk away from her with ease.  I felt relief, but a few seconds later I felt a myriad of emotions I didn’t understand. Where did they come from? In the most optimal conditions, I felt happiness and excitement with Danielle. Not this feeling…

 

I had fallen for her.

 

 

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Jay Thomas

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