Relationships Etcetera

Pick Up the Phone and Call Him, Or Someone Else Will

March 10, 2017 0 Comments

In today's world, we have so many ways to communicate. If that's the case, why is the #1 way to do so, via text or direct message?

I can’t really grasp this concept and I prefer a phone call vs. a text.  I’m old-school in this regard. I would prefer to hear your vocal expression vs. trying to decide your tone through a text.

Prime example. Have you ever seen that movie, “Demolition Man?” Sylvester Stallone has sex with Sandra Bullock via a virtual reality device. They never even touch.  That’s where we’re headed if we don’t improve our communication. I personally wouldn’t hesitate to practice abstinence if we decided to go in this direction as a society.

Technology Has Definitely Hurt Interpersonal Communication

Woman, taking a selfie instead of calling the man she is dating

Photo Credit: Angela Franklin

Go anywhere and you can find tons of people, texting, sending pictures, taking selfies, seeing what’s trending, vs actually talking. I’ve even seen people out on dates, but looking at their phones. The best scene is people out at a party, lounge or some type of social event, and at least half of them are on their phones looking at social media or texting, vs. talking to each other.

Cell phones are one of the greatest creations of my time. However, it seems like we are devolving as it [technology] evolves.

The art of mastering conversation and communication are learned. They are not inherent and definitely not genetic. So, don’t expect a man to simply know how to have a conversation with you, when all you’ve done is text and communicate via direct message on Facebook, Instagram or Snapchat.

Pride over Love?

I hear a lot of women saying that they would prefer a man call them first vs. text them.  But I’ve also seen the same women not pick up the phone to call the man they like/love because they are waiting on him to call. Whether that be the first call or otherwise, that’s your pride and ego talking to you. Like Ving Rhames said in the movie, Pulp Fiction, “That’s pride fucking with you. Fuck pride. Pride only hurts, it never helps.”

So You Want Me To Call Him First?

Why would a woman in today’s progressive society, wait on a man to call her?  Why does it matter who calls who first? I get it, you believe in this old traditional, “men are hunters,” rhetoric. Perhaps this would have been true about 30+ years ago. But today’s men want to feel the effort from the woman as well. Men want to feel appreciated and know that women is fully invested in what they are trying to build together.
A small gesture would be a phone call to let him know you’re thinking about him. See how his day is going vs. texting it to him.  A phone call requires no money whatsoever, so there’s no excuse for anyone (men as well) to not pick up the phone and reach out to someone you care about and are considering as a future spouse or companion. Otherwise…Why are you even dating/seeing them? If you aren’t willing to invest in the man you want, don’t expect him to invest in you.

So what does that all mean?

It’s simple, call him before someone else does. While you’re sitting there waiting on him to call you, some other woman (who is willing to pick up the phone) calls him and engages him in conversation. The effort shows her interest and willingness to invest in him and the relationship.  And a man (just like a woman) will unconsciously and organically grow closer to the person putting in the most effort. Don’t let your ego and pride get in the way of calling someone you care about. Don’t be distracted by the rigors of day-to-day activities, find a few minutes to call him. Also, make sure the call is about him. Not you, not the kids, not your job. Him!
Always make sure the man reciprocates the effort you give. If you call him, make sure he’s returning calls. And, also make sure he’s initiating calls as well. I do not like reactive women who only respond to calls and never start them. However, you are still a woman, and as men, we need to take the lead once a woman has gone outside her box to show her commitment.

Jay Thomas

Yeah it's true... I'm the ultimate blogger/writer/bad boy/urbanite/thinker/philosopher. (yeah...all those) No matter what happens, at the end of the day I’ll make you smile, laugh, and wonder, “How come I’ve never heard of this guy's blog before??!!” Want to know more??? Read more (hint hint) and make sure you leave a comment :) Are you still here? Well, come on…I’M YOUR GUY!!! YOU NEED THIS BLOG in your life!!! Oh and yeah...Don't forget to subscribe!



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